Behind Break Up's

       To love, to be loved, is the most free thing that we could do afford and feel in this world. One dictionary define love as both action and feeling. The action of love generates a blissful feeling called by the same name. When the action stops, the blissful feeling is replaced with pain. 

       Pain is the most and the worst feeling you would feel when the action of love stops. So the pain starts when a partner tells his or her boyfriend or girlfriend that they will never be able to find anyone else as good as they are, the person with no confidence in themselves will start to believe that and after a break-up will feel inadequate and feel that they aren’t good enough to find someone else.

        Making someone else the center of your world is alright if you first know that you are just as good as they are if not better. Demanding respect out of a relationship because you deserve it should be something you should always seek in a relationship and if your partner can’t give you the respect you deserve you should end the relationship knowing that you can find someone else who will respect you.  

        Feeling the doom and gloom after the break-up, affects your self confidence, when you should still be finding ways to enjoy your life without dwelling on a failed relationship. There is always someone better than you last out there, you just have to make yourself available and know that you are worth it.

        Anyone who has experienced real heartbreak knows that it's not just a melodramatic term. The aching, tight feeling that accompanies such sadness is uncomfortable, but usually not disconcerting. However, for people with broken heart syndrome, it feels scarily similar to a heart attack -- in fact, most people are diagnosed after being taken to the emergency room.

        Broken heart syndrome, also known as stress cardiomyopathy, is a sudden weakness in the heart muscle due to a severely stressful situation. It has the same symptoms as a heart attack -- difficulty breathing, chest pain, and a drop in blood pressure -- but while a heart attack permanently damages the heart, broken heart syndrome's effects are temporary. Also, heart attacks are caused by blocked coronary arteries; people can experience stress cardiomyopathy without existing blockages. This important difference is often how doctors determine one from the other.

In 2005, researchers at John Hopkins University discovered the distinction when they studied the hearts of patients dealing with deaths of family members, car accidents, financial woes, and other anxiety triggers. They postulated that being under such stress causes the brain to release a constant stream of stress hormones like adrenaline into the blood, which makes heart vessels work too hard and reduces pumping strength. However, this is but one theory -- doctors are still trying to determine exactly why adrenaline surges affect heart muscle cells the same way that heart attacks do.

The syndrome might be serious like a heart attack, but luckily it's a temporary condition that can be cleared up in about a week with proper medical care. Mostly people just need time to recover from whatever physical or emotional event shocked their systems enough to cause cardiomyopathy. Even seemingly innocent things like surprise parties and public speaking can spark heart problems; many patients don't have preexisting heart conditions, so it is difficult to tell who is at risk for the syndrome. For reasons still unknown, it does occur more frequently in women than men, particularly postmenopausal women.

 

"there is a myth surrounding breakups, and it is that men are able to deal with it in a better way than women. This however is not true." 

        

         Men generally tend to hide the pain after breaking up, and this is just to sustain his macho image. They hide their real feeling and put on a false face of apathy. When in a relation even though they get the signs, they generally do not try to mend the relationship.  And when the final breakup happens they are caught off guard.  There are however some men who take some action, but unfortunately the actions taken usually make matters much worse.Some even resort to escapism and find solace in alcohol and promiscuity. Instead of dealing with the problem face on they hide behind glass of their favorite poison. They are more prone to getting depressed and feeling stressed.

         The effects of marital breakdown on guys have been recognized, but strangely not advertised anyway near as much as the effects on ladies. Females of course struggle and go through many of the same troubles guys go through and loads of different tribulations as well, however the stresses that are placed on the mental well being of a man is not as well understood.  Perhaps the populace simply has the quaint thought that males will survive as we always do, as if it is just in our nature to endure without any troubles (this is of course total trash). Or if you are a cynic, then you might attribute a focused effort of the media and feminist groups who want to promote females over males. I myself cannot be that cynical however, but I think that this is a part of the problem. Then of course there is simply us guys and our often immovable temperament to not seek assistance and not converse about the problems we face. Combining all these things leads to a lack of info for males going through a rough divorce. So this article will cast the frist stone to speak about the effects of marital breakdown on men.

        If a guy is feeling a number of these problems his mental state, and his life in general, will become a total mess. Enduring this and just moving on cannot be done so straightforwardly when you don’t have a family, a home, and a caring companion left to sustain you. The rug gets pulled out from under a mans feet and the more you try to bury these emotional tribulations the worse they get.

Money tribulations

I think this is secondary to the emotional tribulations but clearly alimony, child support, dividing up the family assets, and all other costs involved in divorce hit a man hard. If the guy was the main worker for the family this can also rouse a certain bitterness which is something lots of males take to their grave rather than fixing. a lot of males find themselves in a situation of being middle aged and feeling like they are now struggling like they once did when they were much younger despite a better career or business. If they have job troubles due to the break up and the emotions you are feelign can increase these worries even more.

Parenthood problems and Hurt Kids

Children of course have their own concerns through divorce, but a guys sense of being a good father is often shattered by separation as well. Most dads end up losing the little ones and must be content with visitation rights on the weekend if that. This can make you question your worthiness of being a dad and can hurt emotionally and socially as humanity as a whole seems to frown upon them as if it is their fault for the marital breakdown and that they cannot care for kids.

Loss of Identity

This is a huge one. To be divorced after putting so much of your life into constructing your marriage, your family, your identity of being a spouse, and perhaps a father too; this is stripped away in just a few moments when you finally realize that the break up is final and you are no longer who you thought you are.

"Can you imagine a world without men?  No crime and lots of happy fat women........thus a world without women is a society full of ugly and ruffian men who do not groom themselves   because no woman is to be impressed"